I open another bottle. The pills I collect in the bowl laugh at me. I dilligently take my prescription, accept the dosage, then pour it with the previous ones into the big bowl on my table.
The little white and blue pills laugh with me, because I refuse to ignore reality.
I used to do what the people told me what’s good for me. Take my pills, go to work in the morning, be nice to others, clean up after myself, go to bed early, live my obedient life in plastic happiness. No more.
One evening I came home after a stressful day with an annoying customer. He was the one who installed those malware filled tools on his PC. I didn’t, yet he accused me for sellling him a PC which got slow after just one day. The manager chewed me out for berating the customer. It was not my fault. I had nothing to do with it. But I got punished.
I came home that evening and no longer wanted to be part of “normal” society. I felt tired. So fucking tired.
If this was real, you could take it and shove it where the sun don’t shine.
I got down to the corner store, bought some of the cheapest liqour and spend the night drinking and watching the weirdest movies I could find. I felt thrilled for the first time in a long time.
I ignore the shit thrown at me, and tell what’s on my mind if they bother me. I stopped caring about the fake life you all live in. You can choke in it. I rather have the delusions telling me to live my own life.